: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
