K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
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