If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
