i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Randomize
