Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
