Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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