Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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