last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
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