porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
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