He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Randomize