I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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