wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Randomize
