Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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