508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
