I think my vagina is haunted
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
