TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
