Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I love having hate sex.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize