She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
