Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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