Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize