so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Randomize
