rhymes with "ouble enetration"
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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