drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Randomize
