Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Randomize
