Im at strip club and am horny
dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
