He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
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