apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Randomize
