she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
