The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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