Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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