i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Watching her eat just hurts me
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
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