I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
