After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
