Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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