do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
Randomize
