after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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