playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
