Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Randomize
