That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
