Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
So vagazzling was a success
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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