Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize