Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
