Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
