I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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