the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
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