i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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