summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
