Can i not drive my cunt home
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
we made out on top of his cat.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
porn star boner night. come get it.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
