What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
