He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
