I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
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