So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
